Sad

Very.

Not crying-sad. More like dead-inside-sad.

I really couldn't get out of bed this morning. I was awake, but didn't want to be. Just wanted to stay inside, isolated. Safe. In the end (of course) I had to bite the bullet and get up, get dressed, come to work.

My disappointment is mounting and overwhelming.

I feel rejected when no actual rejection has yet taken place.

Or has it?

Silence speaks volumes.

Maybe the transmission is garbled by my current hormonal trapeze act (no net!), but the message I'm receiving since yesterday is that there are better things to do than being around me. That I'm not even worth a phonecall, or an email.

Or worse: that once again, I'm being taken for granted.

Dunno which one is worse. They both burn inside my chest, like a broken blister.